The App Built From Survival: Dr. Danitza Borges on Protecting Women Before the Crisis Happens
*Trigger warning: this episode contains conversations surrounding domestic violence, SA, and other unsettling topics.
Some products get built because there's a market gap. The Elys Hot Button got built out of a passion.
This week on The Chaotic Middle Podcast, Dr. Borges, CEO of Elys and creator of the Elys Hot Button app, joined me to talk about her personal history, her career in corrections and clinical psychology, and the safety technology she spent six years building.
A Background Built on Survival
Dr. Borges comes from what she described as a deeply dysfunctional family. She was molested by an older brother from age five until seventeen, when the abuse escalated into a brutal rape. That experience shaped nearly every career decision that followed.
After college, the Department of Corrections recruited her. She worked in a sexual predator unit, where she became skilled at reading classification files and profiling offenders. She later earned a PhD in human sexuality and shifted toward helping victims directly. Corporations eventually began contacting her about employees suspected of predatory behavior.
"I thought, somebody needs to change this. Our safety systems are not built for the before. They're built for the after."
That realization became the foundation for Elys.
What the Elys Hot Button Actually Does
The Elys Hot Button is an app that launched about four months before this recording, after six years of self-funded development. Before users jump into rideshares, go on first dates from dating apps, or walk to a car late at night, they can tap a button and leave a message up to one minute long describing where they are, who they're with, or where they're headed.
If nothing happens, the message simply gets swiped away. If something does happen, the message is stored in the cloud, protecting the information even if a phone is lost or damaged. It's released within 72 hours, or sooner if someone files a police report.
"Wouldn't it be amazing if she files her own police report? It lives in the cloud. There's no denying it."
Currently, the app costs $2.69 a month. Dr. Borges intentionally priced it below a bag of chips so every woman and child can access it without financial barriers.
Our World Wasn't Built for Female Safety
Dr. Borges didn't soften this point. The world we live in was built for male safety, not female safety. This keeps women constantly calculating risk in ways most men never have to consider.
"We can't go running without looking over our shoulder. The questions we get asked are which route are you taking, what time will you be home, when will you be checking in. Most men don't even second-guess those questions."
She also pointed to recent changes in Title IX enforcement, which narrowed the definition of reportable sexual harassment on college campuses. Fewer formal investigations now happen, and survivors who do come forward may face panel discussions where they're required to prove what happened. Dr. Borges sees the Hot Button as a tool that removes some of that burden of proof entirely.
Predators Hunt Where No One Will Notice
One of the most sobering parts of our conversation involved the idea of predators actively hunting, rather than simply acting impulsively. Dr. Borges explained that predators often target locations where they believe a disappearance won't draw much attention.
"Our mind is not built to believe that somebody could commit that type of horror. We always think, that's not even possible. But it is."
College campuses are particularly vulnerable at the start of each academic year, when incoming freshmen are unfamiliar with their surroundings and still building their social circles. Dr. Borges points to the disturbing reality of online demand driving this behavior. Cases such as the recent “House of Horrors” in Philadelphia brought to light just how many cases involve massive volumes of exploitative images and videos tied to clear audiences and financial incentive.
Protecting Kids Online Without Realizing the Risk
As a mom of two young daughters, I asked Dr. Borges about the common practice of parents creating social media accounts to showcase their kids' activities, like dance or sports. Her answer was direct.
"Each predator has a taste. It could be a race, the color of her eyes, her hair. Your kids are all so innocent right now. Keep their innocence."
She also raised concerns about AI-driven facial reconstruction tools, which can take a child's image and manipulate it in disturbing ways. Once that content exists online, removing it entirely becomes nearly impossible.
Raising Sons in a Complicated Moment
As a mother, Dr. Borges offered a nuanced perspective on the Cornell 7 story, which raised several issues, including how to handle large group chats and accountability. Rather than rushing to broad judgment, she encouraged pulling back and waiting for more context before drawing conclusions about every individual involved.
"I think we have to kind of just breathe a bit and take it in. We haven't even gotten down to the bottom of everything yet."
She acknowledged the tension many parents feel right now. There is a need to balance real concern for daughters with fairness toward sons who may have been present in a harmful conversation without actively participating in it.
Small, Practical Safety Habits
To help everyone stay a little bit safer, Dr. Borges shared several specific habits she practices with her own family, especially around rideshares.
Hit the Hot Button before getting into any rideshare vehicle.
Record the license plate before you get in.
Film a quick profile shot of the driver.
"If that driver has any ill intentions, he'll pick somebody else, because the fact that he could be on video will be a major deterrent."
She doesn’t want people to see these habits as living in fear, but as building quiet, consistent protection into daily life. It’s the same as buckling a seatbelt without expecting a crash. Hopefully we won’t need it, but it's there if we do.
Making Safety Accessible
The Elys Hot Button is currently available in the United States, Canada, and Mexico, with launches planned in Thailand, Switzerland, and New Zealand in the next few months. You can download Elys from the App Store or sign up through the website. Use the promo code JUSTINCASE for a free month.
Dr. Borges hopes to see the app on the phones of kids as young as ten, as well as adults navigating dating, travel, and daily life. She's currently working to get it into the hands of first responders as well.
Answering the Chaotic Questions
At the end of every episode, I ask each guest the same three questions.
If you could go back in time and talk to your 2005 self, what would you say to her?
"Take the chance. You're here on this planet for a mission. It's not just your journey. It's a mission."
A new mom comes to you for advice. What's the first thing you tell her?
"Love your kids hard. The grades, how popular they are, that's irrelevant. There are no guarantees. Love them hard."
What do you hope your kids remember about you as a mom?
"That mom's one little button saved a life."
Where to Find Dr. Danitza Borges and the Elys Hot Button
Download the Elys Hot Button on the App Store or Google Play, or sign up through the Elys landing page for a free month with the promo code JUSTINCASE.
To connect with Dr. Danitza, you can reach out on LinkedIn, Instagram, or TikTok.
Protect Yourself and the People You Love
If this conversation reminded you how important it is to build safety into daily routines, share it with someone who needs to hear it. Awareness and preparation save lives, and small tools can make a real difference.
I’ll be back next week with another episode of an extraordinary woman in business. Subscribe now to never miss an episode of The Chaotic Middle Podcast:
